Happy Pie Day
Here is a little fic I wrote up in honour of this geek
holiday; enjoy! (Please R&R too, because it IS a holiday.)
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Holmes sat down in his favourite chair, opposite his three
Irregulars. Lestrade took a long drink of tea from her mug, and
listened intently as Tennyson tried desperately to explain
something to Holmes. I lay her breakfast before her, and she
turned, smiled, and mouthed a silent "Thank you" to me.
"Tennyson, my boy, calm down!"
Tennysonís hands were shaking to the point where he could
barely use his synthís keys. He was obviously very upset that he
couldnít properly communicate his idea to his friends, and his
face was flushed red and shining with sweat.
Beep, whirr, clock, click, whirr, cheep!
"I donít understand, Tennyson. It sounds like you said "Happy
Pie Day." Holmesí face was twisted in deep concentration, and he
appeared equally as frustrated as Tennyson that he could not
decipher what the poor boy was trying to say.
"Well, Tennyson," I interjected, "I only baked cookies this
morning, but if you would like some pie I would be delighted to make
"Thatís very good of you, Watson! It must be some school
holiday that Iím not aw-" Holmes was cut off by Tennysonís whirr
of protest. The young Irregular thanked me profusely for the
offer of pie, but said that was not what he meant, and
unfortunately not necessary.
"Er, Holmes-" Lestrade began, swallowing another bite of
waffles soaked in the maple syrup that a friend from Canada had sent
"Later, if you please, Lestrade. Iím attempting to discern what
my Irregular is saying."
"Lestrade, I said-"
"HOLMES! Zed, just let me get one word in, okay?"
"Very well," Holmes grumbled, "What is it?"
"I think Tennyson means pi, as in the measurement, as in 3.14.
A grateful string of beeping erupted from the synth, and the
boy looked as if he could have hugged the Inspector.
"Happy Pi Day?" Holmes said, turning to Deidre and Wiggins, who
simply shrugged and looked back to their friend for a more detailed
"Well, itís March, which is the third month," Lestrade began
slowly, "And itís the 14th, right? So that would make it 3.14 on
the calendar, and that would make it Pi Day!" She took a
celebratory mouthful of waffle, and grinned at Tennyson, who was
practically floating with effusive joy.
Holmes was considerably flustered by the fact that Lestrade had
beaten him to the conclusion. Sinking back into the cushions of
his chair, he seemed almost ashamed of his oversight. Finally
looking up after a few moments, he took one look around the room
at our worried faces and burst into an uncontrollable fit of
Holmesí laugh was very contagious, mainly because it was heard
so rarely that one almost forgot he could laugh. His entire body
shook, his impeccable teeth showed, and tears ran down his now-
red face. Soon we had all joined him, and it took a good ten
minutes before anyone could put three words together.
"Excellent work, my dear Lestrade!" He cried, stumbling over to
where she sat at the table. With a polite "Excuse me." he reached
over and plucked a napkin from her lap to dry away his tears of
"Eyes and brains, Holmes. But mostly brains. I always wondered
if Iíd ever use pi after high school."