The Irregulars' Christmas Caroling

by Casey (Jedi at aemail4u.com)
1/22/04

I wrote this on Christmas...better late than never, I suppose?

On the first day of Christmas my sister gave to me, a fine case of influenza!

On the second day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.....two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the third day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.....three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the fourth day of Christmas, my sister gave to me......four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the fifth day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.....FIVE DAYS OF COUGHING!!!!!!!!!! Four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the sixth day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.... Six pills of Tylenol, FIVE DAYS OF COUGHING!!!!!!!!!! Four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the seventh day of Christmas, my sister gave to me......seven muscles aching, six pills of Tylenol, FIVE DAYS OF COUGHING!!!!!!!!!! Four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the eighth day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.....eight meals of liquid, seven muscles aching, six pills of Tylenol, FIVE DAYS OF COUGHING!!!!!!!!!! Four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the ninth day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.....nine pharmacy runs, eight meals of liquid, seven muscles aching, six pills of Tylenol, FIVE DAYS OF COUGHING!!!!!!!!!! Four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the tenth day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.....ten hours less sleeping, nine pharmacy runs, eight meals of liquid, seven muscles aching, six pills of Tylenol, FIVE DAYS OF COUGHING!!!!!!!!!! Four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.....eleven thermometers, ten hours less sleeping, nine pharmacy runs, eight meals of liquid, seven muscles aching, six pills of Tylenol, FIVE DAYS OF COUGHING!!!!!!!!!! Four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my sister gave to me.....twelve months of Doctor’s bills! eleven thermometers, ten hours less sleeping, nine pharmacy runs, eight meals of liquid, seven muscles aching, six pills of Tylenol, FIVE DAYS OF COUGHING!!!!!!!!!! Four sanitizers, three dirty hankies, two running nostrils and a fine case of influenza!

"Merry Christmas, Mr. ‘Olmes!" Deidre rang cheerfully from the door before slamming it shut to race back to the other two carolers, one sullen boxer and the other playing a keyboard-like instrument.

"Holmes?"

"That was by far the strangest song I have ever heard.....are they allowed to do that?" Holmes questioned as he turned from the door to Watson.

"I suppose it could have been worse," he answered, "They could have sung a few more before leaving."

Already sauntering over to his armchair, Holmes sunk down, running a hand over his forehead. "True, that would have been awful, but I meant altering the verses of the song."

"Ah," Watson said in recognition. "It must have been a joke on someone one Christmas long ago and it stuck, spreading cheer, or in this case, annoyance, with it. At least it’s over now, Holmes."

"Yes. I’ve never heard such discordance in all my two lives. They sang one song and played another. I have a feeling they did that purposefully," Holmes contemplated, furrowing his brows.

Smiling, the compudroid thought to himself, ‘Perhaps tonight then, the joke has been played on you, Holmes.’

Hehe...my congrats to whomever figures out the Christmas carol Tennyson was playing during the song. Cheers.

THE END!

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