My Lovely MST

Part 4

by Mary Christmas (unicorn_76010 at lycos.com)
11/28/01

Yes...I think that will be the title...for now...About this next fic...be afraid. Be very afraid....

They were ever so slowly going insane. Not from having to read the terrible fanfic, but from the sheer boredom of waiting for the next one to be brought.

Lestrade was skipping around the room singing "The Song That Never Ends", while Wiggins and Deidre had a bet going on how long she could keep it up. Watson and Fenwick were arguing over whose 'friend' was the more intelligent. Holmes and Moriarty were talking to each other in Pig Latin. Tennyson was the only one who didn't seem to be affected.

MV: Well, now. I'm back with...what are you doing, Lestrade? Stop! Stop it now!

LESTRADE: (singing)
This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes, it goes on and on, my friend...
Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was,
and they'll continue singing it forever just because...mmmph!
(unable to continue because a gag appears in her mouth. Her hands have been tied behind her back)

MV: Gonna stop?

LESTRADE: (nods emphatically. The bonds and gag disappear)

MV: Okay. Here is your next fic. Hope you enjoy.

HOLMES: I-ay oubt-day hat-tay e-way ill-way.

MV: Do you ant-way e-may oo-tay oo-day at-whay I id-day oo-tay estrade-lay? No? Good.

>>The Case of the Bad Hair Day<<

LESTRADE: Why do I get a bad feeling about this?

HOLMES: Perhaps because nothing good ever comes from these fics?

>>Not going to tell you my name, because, frankly I am ashamed of this fic.<<

MORIARTY: Well, it seems clear that we can expect great things from this fic. Ominous things, but great nonetheless.

MV: Hey! You got that from Harry Potter

ALL: (jump)

FENWICK: What are you still doing here?

MV: I want to see your reactions to this one. I wrote it myself.

>>It was a normal day in the city of New London. People walked around, or floated or..well, you get the idea.<<

LESTRADE: Floating people? Oh, yes, that's certainly an ordinary sight. Why just the other day I saw Greyson float out his window on his way to work.

WATSON: You did? My goodness!

MV: She was being facetious, metal-head

WATSON: Metal-head!

>>It was also a normal day for Professor James Moriarty and his..er..personal slave?...Martin Fenwick.<<

FENWICK: Personal slave!? How dare you! J'en ai ras le bol avec tu et cette. I am getting out of here!

(A/N: Sorry if I got the grammar or spelling on some of this wrong; it's been two years since I took French.)

MV: (calmly) How?

Fenwick: (glowers, but doesn't say anything else)

>>They were trying to find a way to keep a certain annoying yardie out of their hair.<<

LESTRADE: Gee, I wonder who that could be?

>>Only, the plan backfired when Fenwick accidentally spilled his 'concoction' on Moriarty.<<

HOLMES: Need I even point out the gaping plot-hole there?

MV: No. I think everyone can see that for themselves.

>>The 'concoction' was a genetic formula that Fenwick didn't know how it worked, but he thought was a substance that would make you fall in love with the last person you thought about.<<

ALL: Huh?

>>He soon found out, when Moriarty began to...well...I'm too embarrassed to say....<<

MORIARTY: (Rolls his eyes) Let me guess, think I'm either: 1) in love with Fenwick, or 2) in love with Lestrade.

HOLMES: I would have to concur.

LESTRADE: (shudders) Well, I hope it's not me.
(thinks about that and shudders even more) Never mind....

>>Oh, very well...he turned into Lestrade.<<

ALL: What!?

LESTRADE: That's just wrong on sooo many levels.

>>And fell in love with Holmes...<<

HOLMES and MORIARTY: (immediately move as far apart as they can get)

>>And...Holmes not being able to tell the difference... married "lestrade" and they lived happily ever after.<<

LESTRADE: O.o Ooookaaaaay. Well, I wish you two good luck.

HOLMES: Lestrade! For one thing, I would be able to tell the difference between you and an impostor, no matter how identical. For another, I would never ask you to marry me immediately.

LESTRADE: ......Well! now that that's over with....

MV: It's not finished!

LESTRADE: Zed.

>>The real Lestrade was rather unhappy, until she saw that Holmes had not married the fake Lestrade. Only, it wasn't really Holmes. The real Holmes had married the fake Lestrade, and now the fake Holmes was going to marry the real Lestrade.<<

WIGGINS: Does anybody else have a headache after reading that?

>>Then, they met each other, and confessions were made. Holmes was horrified to find out that his Lestrade was really Moriarty. And Lestrade was doubly horrified to find out that her Holmes was really Fenwick.<<

LESTRADE: (looks sick)

HOLMES: Why would she be doubly horrified? My Lestrade used to be a man, for heaven's sake!

ALL: (give him odd looks)

HOLMES: What?

>>So, they switched, and now they all lived happily ever after.
The End.
buh bye. go away. see ya. la la. dum dum. hehe. okay.<<

MV: (beams even though no one can see it)

LESTRADE: I'm scarred for life. I can't believe you wrote that!

DEIDRE: You're scarred for life!? By the way, Wiggins, you owe me fifteen credits. I told you the mysterious voice would stop her.

WIGGINS: What?! No way! I'm the one who said that!

MV: Well! That's my cue to leave. Bye. Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahaahahha.


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